The Quiet Weight of Parenting a Neurodivergent Child
There’s a kind of tiredness that isn’t just physical. It’s the tiredness that comes from holding everything. Your child’s needs, their emotions, the planning, the navigating, the invisible load, all without much space to feel your own.
If you’re parenting a neurodivergent child, whether they’ve received a diagnosis or not, you might know this tiredness well.
You might spend your days managing sensory needs, figuring out certain behaviours, advocating at school, reading, Googling, adjusting, anticipating. You love your child with your whole being and you would do anything for them. But sometimes, it feels like no one sees what it takes.
The world doesn't always make room
So often, it’s not your child who feels overwhelming, it’s the world around them. The lack of understanding. The systems that don’t flex. The stares in public places. The casual comments that make you feel judged or like you, or your child, are less.
You may feel like you’re constantly explaining your child to people who don’t want to understand. You might be having to choose between work and appointments, friends and routines, your needs and theirs.
You’ve become the expert, the advocate, the safe base and you may not even realise just how heavy that role has become.
Where do you go with your feelings?
Often, there’s no space to say how you really feel because you don’t want to sound ungrateful. Or negative. Or like you’re making it about you. But inside, there might be grief. A grief for how hard things feel, for the parenting experience you imagined, for the loneliness that creeps in at the edges. You may also feel pride. Deep love. Fierce protectiveness. But those don’t cancel out the exhaustion. Both can be true.
A place to breathe again
In therapy, I often work with mothers who say things like, “I don’t even know what I need anymore”. They’re not broken, they’re just tired because they’ve been carrying so much, often invisibly, for so long.
Therapy can be a space where you don’t have to explain or educate. You don’t have to be strong, or calm, or knowledgeable. You can just be. Angry, sad, hopeful, numb. Whatever you need.
Because you matter too.
With warmth,
Sian 🙏🏼
Inner Space Counselling